I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
