Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
this is an emotional support booty call
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
