Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize
