The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
She's just so happy...and so naked.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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