You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
