So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize