whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
