Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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