Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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