first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
my being single is dangerous.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
