you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
