Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
