Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Redeem this text for a blowjob
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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