Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I have feelings that need drinking.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
