OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
