Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Randomize
