This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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