she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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