How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
