can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize