so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize
