I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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