So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
