Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
