He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
