Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
