Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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