Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
