So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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