That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
