I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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