I think scott just propositioned me for sex
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
