is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
