Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i permit you to call me
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Less talking, more tequila
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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