I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
