i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
