just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
