Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
