I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
