I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
