I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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