if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
