Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
