the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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