Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
