Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
