Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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