Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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