I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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