Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you win again, gameday.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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