just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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